Zachary and I just celebrated six years together and throughout those six years we’ve experienced college, long distance, and starting our careers. Throughout all of that we’ve made every effort to make our relationship the priority. At times it’s be very hard to find time to spend together especially towards the end of college when we were juggling classes, internships, jobs, greek life, friends, etc. and now we’re beginning our careers which can be hectic at times too. We both work full-time and I spend a lot of time outside of my day job working on my blog and photography business. We work out at different gyms (he won’t come to spin with me), I’m a night person, he’s a morning person. So if you’re reading all this and thinking ok so when do they see each other?! You’re not crazy.
Some days we are like ships passing in the night especially during busy seasons, but once we recognized this we knew we needed to carve out specific time for each other. Some of our favorite ways to spend time together are movie dates, bartaco dinners, walking the dogs, weekend trips (We love traveling together), and sometimes it’s as simple as spending the night at home without cracking a laptop or looking at instagram.
Here’s what you can do to spend more quality time with your significant other:
1. Plan out at least one time per week to spend a few uninterrupted hours together without distractions. If you can do dinner and a movie then make that special, but maybe you only have time for Starbucks and grocery shopping. Regardless, spend the time together and focus on each other. You can make ordinary things special if you put in the extra effort!
2. Determine what it is that you feel you’re competing with and cut it out. For us, we recognize that we’re on our phones too much. So when we eat dinner together we put our phones away. Identify the issue and set mutually agreed upon boundaries, for example, no clash of clans at dinner!
3. Figure out what your significant other’s love language is. This seems corny, but if you do some research on it it will make a lot of sense. Basically there are 5 love languages: words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. So this translates to: saying nice things, spending time with them, presents, doing the dishes, and hugs. Make sense? Now you and your partner might not have the same love language, Zachary and I have different ones. I am 50/50 words of affirmation and gifts if I am the recipient. My default love language as the giver is acts of service. Zachary’s love language as the recipient is quality time. This also isn’t just reserved for romantic relationships this applies to everyone in your life like your mom, sister, friend, etc. Once you can identify what someone’s love language is it can make all the difference conveying your love in a way they are most receptive!
I hope this was helpful! I get a lot of questions about how I balance working full-time, blogging, and my relationship among other things so I figured this post might be helpful to those wondering how Z and I set time aside to spend together.
Photos by Samuel Soucinek Photography